Strictly Douchery: Mass Murderers as Nicknames

Warning: what follows is part douchery and part commentary.  It has very little to do with the hobby and contains images some may find offensive.  It’s also at least a little self-serving…

So it’s perfect for Blood of Kittens!

You’ve been warned… but if you’re not interested in the talkie-talk, skip to the bold sentence at the end.

Every Sunday I chain myself to my desk to slave away for you, my little chickies, writing my Bell of Lost Souls series of articles.  I’m not complaining; I’ve worked hard for over a year trying to build a reputation worthy of notice… because writing for Bell was always one of my goals in this whole blogging thing.

The day Big Red contacted me to give me a shot I sank to the floor and cried like a baby.  Then I blocked the door so my wife couldn’t leave.  Ah, good times!  That’s an example of the light-hearted humor my detractor resents… not sure why.

Let’s cut to the chase though: my style isn’t for everyone.  I know that – believe me I do!  Still, as you’re sitting out there reading this I ask you, if your work is being read and judged by thousands of people practically every day, do you want to go out as a watered-down version of yourself?

I’ll be myself, thanks!

I realize I could sail under the radar by toning down my over-the-top style… but let’s face it: my willingness to risk embarrassment is what got me noticed by readers to begin with.

Still, I have my haters.  Let’s troll a thread, shall we?

The Not-Really Real World

Warboss_Stalin:

Can you highlight the ‘Crunch’ so we can skip the ‘fluff’ (AKA Bad Jokes)? Thanks.

I don’t think this is the first time Warboss_Stalin’s posted a comment trashing my sense of humor, but I don’t care enough to search.  Truth be told, he’s not alone; my stuff does turn some folks off… generally I kill them with kindness if I comment at all.  So why did I do something I rarely do?  Get into it with him?

Brent:

Nope, probably not.

I’d write them even if I was the only person who thought it was funny.

But I’m not, so lighten up already!

Sorry you don’t like my humor, but I’m writing ‘Brent’ – I couldn’t change if I tried.

I’m irritated but not offensive; basically, I’m drawing my line in the sand.  This should have been the end of it.

Warboss Stalin:

You know, if it actually WAS funny, maybe I wouldn’t mind.

This comment is unnecessary on a lot of levels, but 9 times out of 10 I don’t comment.  Why?  Because that’s his opinion and he’s welcome to it.  So why do I continue?  What about this whole thing has irritated me so much?

Brent:

I don’t mind that you don’t mind.

If you can’t see past it all, vote with your mouse. Don’t read any article I write.

Frankly, I’m tired of hearing writing advice from some dude who thought ‘Warboss Stalin’ was a clever idea.

Bingo!  I hate his name.  From where I’m sitting, it’s far more offensive than my poor humor.

Warboss Stalin:

That’s because your (<– ha!) too stupid to realize he has a famous quote that fits ork combat tactics perfectly.

Nope: I understood quite well the moment I saw ‘warboss’ and ‘Stalin’ together.  My father is a historian with a near perfect memory; his idea of a good time was asking me, in public, questions like, “What day of the week was the Battle of Hastings fought on?”  He’d follow it up with, “Who was the winner and when was he crowned king?”  It would embarrass me but my father was a man with no sense of shame.

See where I get it?

Brent:

Could it be, I don’t know, “One death is a tragedy – a million is a statistic?”

That’s what you think is so clever you choose to emulate it as your choice of nickname? It’s famous because of the sheer horror of 20 million plus dead boys.

A generation dead. That was a start.

An Ork horde in a game is fantasy – in real life it’s a nightmare.

Puppy. Don’t memorize one quote and call yourself an intellectual.

By the way, what you’re looking for is ‘you’re’ – as in the contraction, ‘you are.’ You’ve had half an hour to catch that mistake before I came along and called you on it.

That’s funny.

We get to the crux of the issue I have with the whole thing.  I think his nickname is in poor taste, showing little empathy for real live actual human misery.

Warboss_Stalin:

Cute, but no. How about “Quantity has a quality all of its own.” Even in your replies you go off on tangents, assuming you know something about my intellect. If you can’t handle criticism about your pathetic writing skills (or was that a pathetic attempt at satirical writing?), don’t post anything at all.

He’s got a point, but much like the question, ‘Can’t you find it?’ it’s not something you should admit.

Brent:

Mine fits at least as well as yours.  Not really, but that’s my story…

We’re back to square one; if you don’t like my articles, don’t read ‘em. If enough people don’t read ‘em, Big Red will drop me.

Start a club. Have a day.

Back to the Real World

Okay, let’s break this down.

It’s a given that I shouldn’t have responded, certainly not after the first exchange.  There’s no percentage in it.  Nobody cares except the two people trading vitriol and both will end up looking stupid.

Which is what happened here.  I don’t really know this dude; he’s probably an okay guy.

That’s the problem with communicating online; in some ways, it’s media-rich… but much of our gray matter is given over to facial recognition and non-verbal communication, so it’s very, very easy for misunderstandings to happen when I’m nothing but lines on your computer screen.

It’s one of the reasons I use so many exclamation points.

Still, here’s my question to all of you:

Are there real-world subjects that should be hands off when it comes to our hobby?

How okay are you with the nicknames Commissar Pol Pot, Brother-Captain Milosevic, or Farseer Hitler?

Thoughts?  Comments?  Hugs and Gropings?

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Author: Brent

Brent lives in your computer; make no mistake, he is simply lines on your screen. When you get up from your chair, stretching unused muscles after hours of hacking porn sites, he has nothing better to do than wait for you to return.

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