Warning Will Robinson! The following article is not intended to be about competitive play or tournaments or any of my usual stuff! The lists contained herein are not tested and may not actually work the way they are intended to! If you are so super-serious that you are only interested in getting tournament results and playing The Best Thing, turn back now; you will find only nightmares within. That does not mean these lists are not optimized; it means they are optimized to do some very silly and stupid things. I have cut every ounce of fat from them until they are lean, mean machines of whatever absurd facet of the game I have decided to set my tunnel vision on.

So why am I, the person who normally prefaces his writings with a very different kind of warning, writing an article about wacky, crazy armies that should never see the light of day? Well, for one, Tasty brought me on board to write about Tyranids- which, so far, I have not actually done at all. For two, I looooove writing lists. I write lists for armies I don’t play and never will; I write lists I know to be terrible. I write lists that I would hate playing. I write lists that aren’t any fun and no one would enjoy playing. I write lists that can only do one thing, lists that have a million different tools, lists that have stupider gimmicks than an M. Night Shyamalan movie, lists that costs a small ransom to build, lists that only work against one army, lists that revolve entirely around two lines of obscure text in the back of the rulebook, lists that are pulled from an out-of-date codex, lists that focus entirely on someone’s house rules from a thousand miles away, and once in a great while, I write lists that someone else might actually be interested in.

Bottom line being, I enjoy writing lists. I figure I might as well share some of that love with all of you. So below you’ll find some slightly off-the-wall Tyranid lists for unusual occasions; perhaps you’ll find some of them interesting.

Little Lovin’
When it comes to 40K, especially in the U.S. of A., there is a general perception that “real” games are played at 1750 at the very least, if not 1850 or 2000. Screw that, I play 1500 all the time and it’s just fine. But you know what pisses folks off even more? Playing even smaller than that. Below you’ll find some lists for playing at 1000 and even 500pts. The 1K lists will be built as normal, but the 500pt lists will be built to the “40K in 40mins” rules I have seen used many places. Basically, 0-1 each of HQ, EL, FA, and HS and 1-6 on Troops. No models with a 2+ save, no monstrous creatures or tanks with total AV over 33, and no psykers. (Some groups also play with no models with 3+ wounds allowable, but I am ignoring that in light that it eliminates about half the Tyranid codex.)

1000pt Tyranid list
1 Tyranid Prime (LW/BS, Toxin, Regen, Deathspitter)
1 Tyranid Prime (LW/BS, Toxin, Regen, Deathspitter)
2 Hive Guard
10 Termagants
1 Tervigon (Onslaught, Cluster, Talons)
1 Carnifex (2 TL Devs, Regen)
1 Carnifex (2 TL Devs, Regen)

Fexstar, yaaaaaaaaaay! You pile together each of the Primes and ‘Fexes and advance forward shooting S5/6 firepower on the move. Onslaught helps get you forward, and Hive Guard will help shut down tanks along with the S6 from the ‘Fexes themselves. Against foot armies… if you charge them, they’re dead. Lash Whip insures that the Carnifex gets his hits in. You could take some Toxin Sacs on the Tervigon, but it’s mostly there to get the Fexstars into the fight faster and cower on objectives, not do actual damage to anything, so I wouldn’t bother. Combining the two Carnifexes into a single brood lets you move the whole thing faster with Onslaught, but leaves you vulnerable to getting poor Run rolls and makes for more limited movement.

1000pt Tyranid list
1 Tervigon (Cluster, Talons)
1 Tervigon (Cluster, Talons)
2 Hive Guard
2 Hive Guard
10 Termagants
10 Termagants
1 Tervigon (Cluster, Toxin, Adrenal, Talons)
1 Tervigon (Cluster, Toxin, Adrenal, Talons)

Oh, hey there, is that 32 T6 wounds in a 1000pt list? And four bodies spawning troops? Yeah, I think it is. This list is a nightmare for most people- you simply have too many dudes for them to even think about getting rid of them all by the end of the game, and if they move towards the objectives, you drown them in squishy little bodies. Note that only your two scoring Tervigons have AG/TS buffs to share- you will be screening them using the non-scoring HQ Tervigons to make them less likely to die. Feel free to push the expendable Tervis forward to distract the opponent while your other units secretly go for the score. Also, be very careful about how far away you are from the Tervigons- you’re probably going to take those 3d6 hits at least once during the game, just make sure you have cover between you (yes, you’re allowed to take cover saves, just like with Doom of Malan’tai, since it doesn’t prohibit them) and you won’t actually lose much. The list also scales reasonably well to 1500- add another Terma+Tervi combo, a squad of Hive Guard, and Regen to all the troop Tervigons, perhaps with a sprinkling of Catalyst as well.

500pt Tyranid list
10 Genestealers (Toxin Sacs)
10 Genestealers (Toxin Sacs)
9 Genestealers (Toxin Sacs)

This list poses a really simply question to your opponent: how many Genestealers can you kill in two turns? If the answer is not “all of them,” he is going to be in some serious trouble. Now, anyone packing flamers or good mobility or any of a number of other things will make you miserable, but you don’t bring a list with all one model because you want to be good, you bring it because you want to be awesome.

500pt Tyranid list
1 Tyranid Prime (LW/BS, Toxin, Deathspitter)
3 Hive Guard
12 Termagants (Devourers)
12 Termagants (Devourers)

This is another “question” list. You have a crapload of shots against anything not in a tank, probably far more than enough to kill it off. The Hive Guard break things open and the Devilgaunts ruin them with sheer weight of fire- and even just five Termagants are still putting out a lot of firepower, so your opponent has to wipe the squads down to a man. The Prime provides Synapse and melee defense- it chops up most anything you could possibly fight in a game this small.

500pt Tyranid list
3 Lictors
2 Lictors
3 Tyranid Warriors (Boneswords, Adrenal, Spore)

Hello there! You don’t have a lot of guns; you don’t have a lot of CC power (although the Warriors are pretty scary to most things). What you do have is the ability to place most of your army exactly where you want them and wipe out a portion of the enemy’s forces. Warriors can score a point and the Spore can help contest; likewise, Lictors can bounce about the battlefield wreaking havoc and whittling things down.

Pick a Card
Here we have one thing and one thing only: gimmick lists. These are lists with a purpose, lists that you do not bring to win the game, but rather to win personal victories of some kind or another; what happens with some silly “objective markers” or “kill points” or such nonsense is utterly beyond their care.

2000pt Tyranid list
1 Hive Tyrant (HC)
2 Tyrant Guard
3 Lictors
3 Lictors
3 Lictors
20 Termagants (2 Strangleweb, Spore)
20 Termagants (2 Strangleweb, Spore)
3 Warriors (VC, Spore)
3 Warriors (Spore)
1 Mawloc
1 Mawloc
1 Mawloc

Well now, these are some pretty bad units, right? Your mission is simple: kill things with Mawlocs. To this end, you have a bunch of big squads that you want to dump onto the field and block things up. Try and spread yourself around so you occupy the maximum space and remember the 1″ rule. As much as possible, let the Lictors guide the Mawlocs in and, more importantly, use them to block things in. Units that have no legal position to move to when a Mawloc displaces them are completely destroyed. Doing this to a Land Raider or Monolith is, of course, very classy, but just think- what if you did it to a full mob of Ork Boyz? What about a bunch of Assault Terminators? How awesome would it be to burrow a Stormraven to death and all its cargo with it? Crazy death worm comes outta the ground and suddenly Battle Brother Pilot Agustus panics, doesn’t know what to do, and decides that the only proper course of action is to drive down and to the left, straight into the damn thing’s mouth. You are allowed to giggle a little when this happens, but too much is considered ungentlemanly. Vehicles are relatively easy to do this to, since they can’t assault you; for other units you will have a much harder time, but remember that you are allowed to have the Mawloc arrive on top of units- including units in close combat. And units in close combat tend to be pretty thoroughly surrounded, with nowhere to go. And Lictors have Hit and Run, which you might want to use at the end of the enemy’s turn to move those 3d6″ to be in a better position to eat some people. The Stranglewebs are there in case you can’t quite kill something- at the very least you can clump them up and get 10+ guys under a template, right?

2000pt Tyranid list
1 Parasite of Mortrex
2 Hive Guard
2 Hive Guard
10 Termagants
10 Termagants
10 Termagants
1 Tervigon (Cluster, Adrenal, Toxin, Catalyst)
1 Tervigon (Cluster, Adrenal, Toxin, Catalyst)
1 Tervigon (Cluster, Toxin, Catalyst)
1 Harpy (Cluster, HVC)
1 Harpy (Cluster, HVC)
1 Harpy (Cluster, HVC)
3 Biovores
3 Biovores
3 Biovores

Poopers! That’s what this list does- it poops more models onto the table, over and over again. The Parasite hooks up with some ‘Gants initially and moves forward, trying to get in range to charge something, while the Biovores and and Harpies bombard the enemy from afar. With only five real AT shooting units you’re probably not going to de-mech the enemy, but you can keep him suppressed, which makes a lot of people unhappy. Climbing out of their tanks is pretty bad for them, too, though, as it means getting pooped on by all the guys in the back line. And, to make it worse, your Tervigons spit out a sea of annoying little dudes and the Harpies can dive-bomb things like the oversized pigeons they are. See if you can drive your opponent insane keeping track of all the Spore Mine models. Oh, if you happen to go up against someone playing an infantry horde army… you win. Congratulations.

2500 Tyranid list
1 Swarmlord
2 Tyrant Guard (Lash Whips)
1 Hive Tyrant (Wings, HC, OA, HVC)
9 Ymgarl Genestealers
9 Ymgarl Genestealers
1 Doom of Manan’tai (Spore)
10 Termagants
1 Tervigon (Cluster, Catalyst, Adrenal, Toxin, Talons)
9 Genestealers (Toxin)
9 Genestealers (Toxin)
8 Genestealers (Toxin)
8 Genestealers (Toxin)
1 Trygon (Adrenal)
1 Trygon (Adrenal)

Is your local ‘Ard Boyz full of shitty foot lists? Then do I have an army for you, my friend! Everything but the Swarmlord is fully reserve-capable and you come in on a 2+ starting on turn 2, and when it does you begin wrecking face almost immediately. If the enemy clusters up in the center of the field to avoid ‘Stealers, Doom wrecks them. If they spread out, they’re easy prey for both kinds of ‘Stealers. Trygons are just in there because you’re already running reserves, so why not? They also give you a way to handle Land Raiders and other stupid gimmicks. Assault Terminators are something of an issue for you, but Swarmlord should be able to handle them reasonably well if you get the charge- Paroxysm + Preferred Enemy means you will kill 1-3 of them and they won’t get many hits back at you. Doom also helps there, as their Ld isn’t any higher than normal and making saves is not something they really want to have to do too much of. IG will be a pain, so try and get stuck into multiassaults where you can hang around until the end of their turn.

1850pt Tyranid list
1 Hive Tyrant (Wings, HC, OA, HVC)
1 Hive Tyrant (Wings, OA, HVC)
3 Zoanthropes (Spore)
2 Zoanthropes (Spore)
2 Zoanthropes (Spore)
10 Termagants
1 Tervigon (Cluster, Catalyst, Adrenal, Toxin)
30 Gargoyles
30 Gargoyles
1 Harpy (Cluster, HVC, Regen)

The air force list. Unfortunately, GW did not see fit to give us any flying guys in the HS or Troops slots, so we ignore the latter and take a minimal presence of the former. FA is, of course, completely full, but we can also pretend that Zoanthropes “fly” because they very clearly do even if they don’t get to move 12″ per turn (if only!) HQs are our two Tyrants, who can be well-screened by Gargoyles and Harpies. We could run a Parasite, but Parasite is kind of… bad. We would much rather have a guy that doubles the effectiveness of our Gargoyles (Preferred Enemy + Blinding Poison = awesome) AND is a monster in close combat AND brings an extra gun to the table. You will rarely want to deep strike the army, Zoanthropes aside- outflanking the Tervi and deploying the others on the table to threaten turn 2 charges is much more scary most of the time, but the option is there at least.

Whew! We’ll go ahead and call that enough lists for the time being- undoubtedly at some point in the future I will do another such article as my brain fills up with nonsense ideas that need to be gotten out into the world (and assuming professional trepidation is still too expensive an option.) Until then, don’t be afraid to admit that your list is stupid- instead, carry the title with pride!