His name is Strawberry. He just consumed a small child.
Now, I know all of you have probably seen much bigger in the dunes near Baghdad, or under a rock in Arizona, and maybe I am being a huge pussy, but this is Connecticut. The most ferocious monster around here should be that soccer mom driving an Escalade in front of me and the largest man eaters should be Deer Ticks in the back yard.
But no, I just encountered Strawberry, in my mailbox.
He met his fate via mail box door.
Observe his abdomen. It is the size of George Washington's head. (After crushing)
He has as much hair as I do on my back.
He had so much mass that when the door slammed shut, wedging him into the rim, it was difficult to open again.
I don't think spiders have muscles, but if he did, I think he could press more than me.
I don't know what kind of spider this is and you are welcome to speculate, please let me know, but his total body was close to the size of this quarter, and with his legspan, could easily attach himself to my face like the impregnator from Alien and suck the life out of my head.
I think I heard him scream NOOOOOO as the door slammed shut. In a little, but deep spider voice.
I am off to Home Depot to pick up a HUGE bottle of bug killer.
Jawaballs