by SandWyrm


For those of you like me, who do enjoy silly games from time to time, but don't want to waste $125 just to make stupid GW-themed farting noises, there's a much better game out there than Age of Sigmar. It's called "Monkeys Need Love Too" from Topwise Games, which I supported on Kickstarter.



For $20 (or less), you get a nice portable (and kid-friendly) card game that's about you, an animal rights activist, trying to free more monkeys from a perfume research lab than your opponents.

There's 3 phases to the game:

1) The Draw Phase

You keep drawing cards until you have 5 in your hand. If you draw a banana card you lay it down in front of you and keep drawing. Some people will draw 10+ banana cards until they get 5 monkey or action cards in their hand.

2) The Action Phase

You can put down a monkey (don't forget to feed it), and lay down as many action cards as you like. Stuff like giving opponent monkeys diseases, luring them away, or setting off the lab alarm to end the game. The last of which can be countered by a card where you're required to scream out a strange phrase in German that makes all the monkeys stop what they're doing and stand at attention.

3) The Flinging Poo Phase

After feeding your monkeys, you can "eat" two bananas and fling poo at another player, which might make them do something awful. You can do this as often as you like.


Game balance? There is none. Monkeys will be killed, lured away, redistributed evenly, or die of starvation (from you not feeding them).


Monkeys that cost 3 bananas to feed will do nothing, while those that cost only 1 or 2 bananas per turn will have extra abilities.

And when that lab alarm does finally go off? Well then you draw a random card from a special deck that might give you monkeys, take them away, and/or send you to jail. Meaning that the game is about as random as Candyland. No wait, it's more random.

But hey! You get to laugh with your friends, fling some poo, and it won't cost you $125 and several hours of your life assembling and painting little miniatures!


Then, when Exploding Kittens (another Kickstarter I supported) finally ships in late July, you can move on to the new awesomeness and still have spent less on your LOL-play than you would have on the by-then-stale Age of Sigmar.